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Feeling Good Together: The Secret to Making Troubled Relationships Work
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Based on twenty-five years of clinical experience and groundbreaking research on more than 1,000 individuals, Feeling Good Together presents an entirely new theory of why we have so much trouble getting along with each other, and provides simple, powerful techniques to make relationships work. We all have someone we can’t get along with—whether it’s a friend or colleague who complains constantly; a relentlessly critical boss; an obnoxious neighbor; a teenager who pouts and slams doors, all the while insisting she’s not upset; or a loving, but irritating spouse. In Feeling Good Together, Dr. David Burns presents Cognitive Interpersonal Therapy, a radical new approach that will help you transform troubled, conflicted relationships into successful, happy ones.Dr. Burns’ method for improving these relationships is easy and surprisingly effective. In Feeling Good Together, you’ll learn how to: - Stop pointing fingers at everyone else and start looking at yourself.- Pinpoint the exact cause of the problem with any person you’re not getting along with.- And solve virtually any kind of relationship conflict almost instantly.Filled with helpful examples and brilliant, user-friendly tools such as the Relationship Satisfaction Test, the Relationship Journal, the Five Secrets of Effective Communication, the Intimacy Exercise, and more, Feeling Good Together will help you enjoy far more loving and satisfying relationships with the people you care about.You deserve rewarding, intimate relationships. Feeling Good Together will show you how.
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Product details
Paperback: 288 pages
Publisher: Harmony; Reprint edition (January 26, 2010)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0767920821
ISBN-13: 978-0767920827
Product Dimensions:
5.2 x 0.8 x 8 inches
Shipping Weight: 9.1 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
Average Customer Review:
4.6 out of 5 stars
119 customer reviews
Amazon Best Sellers Rank:
#22,017 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
Between this book and "Feeling Good" I was able to defuse a very public and very painful work situation that happened to me. I wrote a detailed review of the situation in my review for "Feeling Good" so I won't go into specifics here, but I will say it was so bad that I found myself screaming at a new coworker without even realizing how loud I was. I was told later that my voice was so loud that the entire office rang with every word. No joke.The "Feeling Good" book was really good for me to write down all the bad feelings that I had about myself and how I was being treated by this new coworker. It was also good to then continue with the exercise on how I could turn that all around. And I did! I was shocked to see that my reactions to her were changing in a positive way, even though she was threatening me with lawsuits just like before and unable to do her job, just like before.This book, "Feeling Good Together" builds on the first book by introducing the "EAR" concept. EAR stands for Empathy, Assertiveness, and Respect. It was VERY helpful for me when I had to say some not so good things to people about their performance, but do it in a respectful way. I had never before had a tool to assert myself without being negative about it. That exercise was worth the price of this book 100x over.I've bought several copies of this book, but nobody wants to read it. If they really understood why it was so valuable to me, I think they would give it a closer look.
A very wise woman recommended this book to me. She thought it could help me improve my family relationships. So far I've been reading it with my boyfriend and doing the exercises together. We've loved it, it has really made a difference in our relationship. We've been able to talk about really difficult topics that we used to avoid.I loved it so much that I actually bought 3 copies, and I bought some of his other books too!It will only help if you actually DO THE EXERCISES. That's my number one tip.
This book made me rethink how I communicate with others--especially in situations where emotions run high. I realize it's pitched as helping with personal interactions but I'd suggest every organization, every company could benefit if it encouraged all it's employees to read this book. Overnight I suspect those companies and organizations would see a vast improvement in productivity and unit cohesion. On a personal level, this book has made me realize why some past interactions went disastrously wrong and helped me move forward while taking part in some difficult but important conversations that could impact both my personal and professional life.
I have read many books on communication and have attended many marriage seminars and the like. This book caught my attention for some reason. I have now purchased 5 copies. I bought them for both of my sons and my husband. We bought the e-book, but my husband wanted a hard copy to take notes. I thought that was a good sign he would take it seriously! We have been married for 50 years and have a good marriage. This book has taught me many things. I feel that it has already improved our communication. Also, I realized some of the destructive habits I was doing in my conversation with my children and grandchildren. I am hoping I will be able to improve my communication in a variety of settings as I continue to use the principles I have learned in this book.
This book has become my new relationship bible. It will take much more practice because there are so many techniques to master. The exercises will need to be practiced several times until it becomes second nature to focus on improving relationships rather than win arguments. TEAM - CBT Offers an option to endless therapy. Bravo Dr. Burns for having the courage to share this with the world, challenging “the old waysâ€.
I found this book to have wonderful insights. The tone of the book makes you feel as though you are discussing things with a trusted and thoughtful friend. The exercises in the book helped to channel some disconnected thoughts into something more coherent. I found this book to be helpful.
I'm an intern marriage and family therapist and I have specialized in couples and families. I have read many books from different authors, including the acclaimed Dr. John Gottman. Dr. David Burns' book is the best I have ever read. The book is easy to understand and the concepts are very practical. I bought the book in audio and kindle. I read it three times to thoroughly understand and grasp the message. I highly recommend it for anybody who wants to master their ability to relate with people and communicate in a kind and respectful way.
Best relationship book I've ever read. Even if you aren't in a relationship at the moment this book should be required reading for everyone.
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